The Gift of Love

Anyone who has ever experienced love: be it in the form of philia (love of friends/things); eros (love of a sexual nature); agape (unconditional, sacrifical, selfless love) or storge (familial love): would surely agree that it was one of the greatest gifts ever given to humankind.

In fact, the Bible professes it to be greater than hope, and even greater than faith:

"So faith, hope, love remain, these three; but the greatest of these is love." (1 Corinthians 13:13)

And yet it seems to me that, as human beings, we try to put sanctions and restrictions on it.

Take, for example, the Muslim doctor Humayra Abedin, held captive for over four months by her own family, and then forced to marry a total stranger whilst heavily sedated, all because her family disapproved (perhaps an understatement) of her relationship with a Hindu man whilst she was living in London.

What struck me, apart from the fact that anyone could treat another human being in this way, let alone a member of their own family, and the horrors of being forced to give one's life to someone they have never even met, who could be a rapist, paedophile or murderer for all they know; is that it seems to me that this family reacted in such a way in order to exert control over whom this poor woman could love.

Dr Abedin is an NHS doctor in the UK. She does a job which involves a tremendous amount of willpower, strength and determination. It is a job which literally involves saving lives, and helping one's fellow human beings day after day. Can anyone begrudge this poor woman some happiness with the man she loves?

This may be an extreme case, but as a society we are all guilty of trying to dictate who can and cannot be in love. We have strong issues if there is a significant age gap between two people: yet if they are genuinely in love, why should we want so much to end their happiness? And we simply cannot abide two people of the same sex having feelings for each other: we feel it is our duty to make it clear that such behaviour is unnatural and immoral.

And who are we? Who are we to dictate what is natural or unnatural? Who are we to say what is right or wrong? And who are we to say that any two people do not have the right to love one another?

As long as a relationship is between two consenting people who are perfectly aware of their feelings (that is to say, I am not trying to justify paedophilia or bestiality, for instance), and are not doing anyone any harm, then perhaps we ought to leave them be: as we ourselves would not like anyone to begrudge us the joys of true love.

After all, every human being is created by God, and are all equally entitled to know the joys of true love, irrespective of gender, religion or sexual orientation. After all, the gifts of God ought to be available for anyone to experience.